Quiet Glee

There is no shortage of Not Okay in this little world of ours.  If this little room in the interwebs reflects anything, it's my awareness and wrestle with the Not Okay.

But good living requires some Praise Be! and the last two weeks have been full of it.  Sunshine and ocean and togetherness are my family's favourite things and enjoying said favourite things for this long is The Opposite of Not Okay.  Like maybe even Really Great.

However, I don't know how to make sense of the Really Great.  I mean, I enjoy it, but in my world view when the beauty of God With Us is the comfort of the Light when life is Dark, there's not a lot of room for Light when there is an abundance of light already.  Is that f*cked or what?

My holiday included a later-blogged-about-by-coHolidaying-blogger conversation about the silliness of giving God credit for when good things happen (Hallelujah! The cancer is gone! I got the job! She said yes! I found a parking spot! Jesus loves me so much...) but not blaming same deity when things go awry.  I listened in on the conversation, but really, didn't have a lot to say 'cause that's just not how I live in the Kingdom.

Trying to make sense of this happy place in my life, I realize it's actually the exact opposite of my own zone: I have lots of time for the Prince of Peace, the Wonderful Counselor, Almighty God, Creator Deity who shows up when the going gets tough and says Do Not Be Afraid for I Am With You and other lovely things.  For the Great Hander-Outer of Treats in the Sky, not so much.

So my spiritual discipline for the next 24 hours will be keeping my eyes open for That God, the One who delights in doing good and in unreasonable generosity and maybe even this quiet glee I find myself packing back into our suitcases.