I know a rad gardner who also writes cool things and thinks cool things and often pretends that I write and think cool things too. I think it is safe to say that when we first met each other 15 years ago, we would not have anticipated being such big fans of each other in 2012. This is one of the things that is great about this life: we don't get left with our 25-year-old brains (or hearts for that matter) (although I'd take the body and skin back...) and if we are willing, we get to get wiser and collect the best parts of a lot of people our 25-year-old selves didn't know to collect.
Anyway, today she posted this awesomeness here. And it really made me want to see if I had my own answers and so here I am writing for the first time in what feels like a long time and I like it. I don't even know yet what I'm going to write down, but I'm already just full of Thank You to NvK for inspiring this attempt.
So Three Things I Want For My Kids:
1) A Willingness To Give Faith a Fair Shot. Or alternately, At Least A Deep-Tucked-Away-Knowing That God Thinks They're Awesomesocks.
My sweet husband's mom died 18 days ago. I find myself saying "mystery" and "I don't know" a lot. I think I am supposed to tell them she's safe in one of many rooms with Jesus in Heaven eating calorie-free petit fours from the Bon-Ton and then mostly singing awesome songs. I love Jesus like crazy and am hoping against hope that Heaven is a real experience for this soul but you know, I won't die of shock if it turns out I got it all wrong. And so, it makes me loathe to tell my people anything definitive about God. I realize this makes me a not-magazine-profile-worthy Christian mom, but I just can't do it. Except for the part where I am certain the Creator loves them truly and deeply and is paying attention to their lives. And that I'm willing to invest a lot in the promise of Presence, the promise that God Godself will show up and that that showing up will make a difference. Every time. I can tell them that part. And I can hope that my constant chatter about who I imagine God to be and who Jesus keeps being all over that Bible of ours will lodge itself in the nooks and crannies of their cerebellums and just kind of soak into who they are. I can hope that. And then maybe even want that. I want that.
2) An Ability to Build a Community:
This life is a trick and it feels lonely, a lot. What sucks is when we're really, truly Alone and really truly Lonely at the same time. The only solve I know for this is community. The community may include a spouse or children. It may include neighbours and school friends. It may include drinking buddies and church-makers (and what sweetness when those are the same people!). It may include your preschool table-sharer and the lady in line at the grocery store last night. Whoever is in the circle becomes a Life-Giver and a Hope-Maker and a Reason-To-Not-Quit and we do so much better with a collection of people to love us this way. But community-building isn't natural or easy for all souls and so I really want to somehow help my people learn how to do this so that when they find themselves Lonely, they'll need not be Alone and when they find themselves Alone, they'll not feel so Lonely.
3) To Chew With Their Lips Closed.
I'm with NvK. We will not be able to live together much longer if a certain pair of preschoolers don't get this figured out. Stat.
