Lent 1

I found my Advent project lovely and good and so I am going to try to do similar through Lent. Make space to read the actual Bible everyday, and think on what God may have to say, and make space for God to be loudest in my world.  Part of my emotional dieting I guess - if I take in more God, maybe I won't be as hungry for all the other crap I've been eating.

I will be following the readings laid out here.  There are a lot of passages to read every day and I will indeed read them, but I will only focus on one of them here. If you are following along, and you can find time, probably it's even better if you read all of it too.  The Bible is better than me at talking in God's voice.

One thing that's hard about Lent is that pesky focus on sin.  I don't like to think of myself as sinful, or fallen, or not quite up to scratch. I like the version of faith where God loves me just the way I am. God as Mr. Rogers I guess (have I written about this before? this feels very familiar...).  Apparently God does love me all to bits and pieces but God also sees the brokeny, less-than-ideal parts and says, "Have you considered giving any of those up? I could take them for you."  Most often, I seem to say no thanks and then something like, Tell me more about how much you love me again.  It says a lot about God that God hasn't moved to Toledo to avoid me.

All of today's readings are all full of God noticing that perhaps we're holding on just a bit too tightly to the holes.  How ludicrous to hold on to holes though: there's nothing there! And yet they can feel like the most important part.  Oh my soul, I'm so dumb sometimes. Jonah dumb (for sure read the Jonah passage: I laugh out loud every time I get to line, "I'm so angry I could die." I know exactly how he feels).

But Lent asks me to give up being dumb and to let Jesus dying be important and necessary and meaningful, not for The World, but For Me. And for The World too. But this Lent, For Me.

Psalm 32

New International Version (NIV)

Psalm 32

Of David. A maskil.

¹ Blessed is the one
    whose transgressions are forgiven,
    whose sins are covered.
² Blessed is the one
    whose sin the Lord does not count against them
    and in whose spirit is no deceit.

³ When I kept silent,
    my bones wasted away
    through my groaning all day long.
⁴ For day and night
    your hand was heavy on me;
my strength was sapped
    as in the heat of summer.^[b]

⁵ Then I acknowledged my sin to you
    and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, “I will confess
    my transgressions to the Lord.”
And you forgave
    the guilt of my sin.

⁶ Therefore let all the faithful pray to you
    while you may be found;
surely the rising of the mighty waters
    will not reach them.
⁷ You are my hiding place;
    you will protect me from trouble
    and surround me with songs of deliverance.

⁸ I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
    I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.
⁹ Do not be like the horse or the mule,
    which have no understanding
but must be controlled by bit and bridle
    or they will not come to you.
¹⁰ Many are the woes of the wicked,
    but the Lord’s unfailing love
    surrounds the one who trusts in him.

¹¹ Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous;
    sing, all you who are upright in heart!

I will confess my sin to the Lord and then I will remember to hide out with God and then I will remember I am not a horse who needs to be led around because I don't come when I'm called and then I will look around and see yet again that at every turn, there is God's unfailing love and I will have to do Joy! all over again.

 PS: It is a bit embarassing how hard it is to think up sin to confess. I think that's why I get 40 days.