The End

2013 ends and I carved out an hour to be thoughtful about it and make note of what ends with it. I even made time to imagine what 2014 might bring in. Oddly, I did all of this with pen and paper. I haven't written that way in many moons, and it has been a lovely discipline these last two days, to feel the urgency of the words reflected in my grip of the pen. I forgot that word/body connection that comes with hand-writing.

I have now given myself 15 minutes to share with you, my writing-reading friends, a few selected thoughts. The place of my more public-private writing in my life is a sweet one, and what it has mostly brought is a tiny sliver of not-so-lonely, knowing that these words of mine land in places I do not know, but are carried by a few others for a minute or two. The you of you making space for my words over these last years has been a great gift to me, and I'm deeply thankful for it. By giving you these words too, I invite you into the circle of accountability that is invisible to be sure, but nonetheless powerful for this heart.

The close of 2013 is the close of a few important things: our financial life as we knew it, our formal churching, and my 30s.  Those are big goodbyes in obvious ways, but there is not much in the way of sadness for me in this. Just a relieved gratitude really. In each of those spaces, there was so much goodness for so long, but in their closing there is now space for something new to show up. I am bidding them each adieu with fondness I guess. At least I am today. I was weeping about each of them at some point in the last year...

Tonight, we will end 2013 and if we can make it, start 2014 with our neighbours. We will share a meal and share opinions and share drinks and shares giggles and probably share a few curse words. I like it so much because I am so hopeful that neighbouring will continue to take up more and more space in my life in the year(s) to come.

As I've thought about the rest of what the year to come could bring, I've kept tripping across the word brave. I won't say more about that now, but that's where I'll end. Be Brave. Do it even when fear is lingering nearby. Do it anyway.  The its are yet to be named, although they are sometimes imagined. But they are there waiting to be done.

Stay tuned. And of course, a very Happy New Year.